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Chapter 1

He sat and watched himself. The floor was sticky with the reflection of pigeons. His head had never felt so detatched,  last night was weird.  Most nights could be said to be weird, an endless combination misty mountain hops and stephanie says, but last night unusually weird. Running his hand through his hair felt like running his hand through butter, this disgusted him and his stomach told him so. "You're disgusting, and why in fuck's name an i digesting detergent?" He groaned and rested his chin on his hand. His stomach hadn’t spoken too him often and it made him fastidiously nervous. 

Slowly sitting up, a pretty stewardess in a blue pinafore offered him a towel wipe, he cleanly and politely declined. As he reclined, his unshaven chin seared his unshaven hand with a veracity of sandpaper and knives.  Looking around he was slightly surprised to find a cow asleep at his feet, Daisy was usually an early riser. 

In another brain, the encephalitic thoughts of the harlot stewardess rolled in memetic images of fucking and fighting and biting the unclean passenger. "I think she smiled at me, maybe I should ask for details", he thought to himself. Jarring his thoughts, his left leg was numb from the awkward weight of Daisy. "Excuse me", he beckoned the blue pinafored harlot, "but I think Daisy has overslept." “meanwhile I have overwept” she subtly replied. He exuded a bemused look of confused indulgence. She then bit him. "ouch" he cried inwardly, but accepted the neat plastic packet of biscuits she offered him, (pea)nuts(!!1) she was a sly one. 

Before it was even all over, it had finished and she was already gone. He disembarked the plane with nothing but a biscuits, a teeth mark, and a hazy memory to remind him. He couldn’t honestly remember if he had passed out, and his stomach wouldn’t tell  As he plummeted through the damp clouds, he paused to wonder if the blue pinafored harlotlen conveyer of peanuts thought his exit from the plane abrupt, and hoped she didn’t think him impolite, oh Daisy he thought, noticing the cow, flailing udders, fall